UNIVERSE IS A FUNKY PLACE

 

“Everything that happens in your life is the best possible thing that can happen to you”

– Chris Prentiss

 

  • Every single moment of your life is the moment YOU have a choice to make.

  • Every single moment of your life is the moment YOU desire and it’s given to you.

 

The question is, how do you want to receive it?

 

I am going to show you the THREE ways how to receive whatever is meant for you!

 

GRATITUDE

— If friends you invited for a dinner won’t say thank you, would you invite them again? —

Say thank you. Give thank you.

 

* First and foremost, appreciate Yourself. Be grateful for the life you live, for the world around you, for the loved ones, for the money and the house you have. However, be even more grateful for feelings and emotions. Be mindful of your inner voice and instincts.

* Appreciate your loved ones. Be amazed at small things such a smile, a gesture, and a hug. Be aware of the beauty around you in the other people’s eyes, in your spouse’s body language, in your kid’s smile.

* Appreciate your friends and co-workers. They are in your life for a reason, to create that beautiful life story of yours. Be mindful of what your life might have been without them.

* Appreciate the stranger. Discover the magic behind the THANK YOU expressed towards the person you just passed on the way to work or in the store. Be amazed by how that simple courtesy can impact that person and you in a positive way.

* Appreciate the Universe/God/Higher Power/Divine. Would you be who you are without all the moments and experiences in your life? Be understanding that expressing appreciation for what you already have will just give you more of it.

* Say and give THANK YOU to your life: moments, events, people, items and whatever else you are grateful for WITHOUT COMPARISONS TO OTHERS. That creates the powerful mindset you want to walk into your day with.

 

HOW TO DO THAT?

** write every morning and evening what are you grateful for – be honest and feel it!

** ask yourself why are you grateful for that – be honest!

** ask yourself what would you do to make someone else happy – be honest!

** ask yourself how could you contribute to tomorrow’s day to make it worthy – be honest!

** say THANK YOU to stranger, co-worker, friend, or loved one today!

** say THANK YOU to someone who you didn’t talk to for more than 6 months!

 

RESULTS:

As your day goes, by appreciating yourself, you will feel lighter, happier and encouraged to take upon any challenge you may face during a day.

As your day goes, by spreading the appreciation around you, you will experience more love, smiles, kindness, and help from other people.

 

 

LOVE

Self-love is different than self-care.

Sure, get yourself a nice haircut, manicure or buy yourself flowers. It makes your physical body feel loved.

However, practice self-love by making your soul and heart feel loved, too.

 

* Light the candle in a place where there are nothing and nobody except for yourself. Feel the silence. Feel your body. Feel your anxieties. Feel your happiness. Feel your inner voice.

* Just be, just listen.

* Is this moment making you feel uncomfortable? If yes, that’s great. Moments like that bring a lot of teachings.

* Your inner voice is sending you an important message. Is it because you feel pain, or maybe are miserable at work, or maybe it is the lack of love in your life, including from yourself? Whatever it is, be in that feeling.

* Marinate yourself in that feeling. Say them out loud, write them down, read them again.

* Cry if you feel like.

* Smile if you want.

* Dance if you desire so.

 

There are not bad or good emotions. They all mean something to us. They give us a cue of what is happening in our life, in our deepest soul.

Escaping from the emotions and signs your body is showing you will just extend the pain you are living in.

 

HOW TO DO THAT?

** mediate in the morning before you even grab the phone

** wake up earlier than others so you have a quiet moment for your inner voice to listen

** give yourself few minutes during the day to breath, to space out, to daydream, to escape from everything around you

** journal all your emotions, don’t feel ashamed or judged – it is you who you want to be comfortable with at first

** write the letter to yourself from the perspective of the inner women and inner you – be kind, loving, non-judgmental and critic-free

** be aware of all good things around you.

 

RESULTS:

The more you take care of yourself, the more love you are able to spread.

The more you love yourself, the more compassion is around you.

The more you respect yourself, the more kindness will be in your presence.

 

 

INTENTION

What are you choosing to focus on? How is that serving or hindering you?

Do you visualize your future as if it’s happening now?

Do you see yourself as a successful, happy, balanced and empowered woman?

 

The intentions are your thoughts, desires and inner voice towards the vision you place ourselves in! The way you see yourself walking, feeling, reacting, living and being in the future, that’s the way you will become.

 

* Is it that you want to be anxiety-free? – imagine that lightness!

* Is it that you want to be debt-free? – picture that financial freedom!

* Is it that you want to be loved? – feel that you are loved!

* Is it that you want to be respected? – act that way!

* Is it that you want to be successful? – live like a successful person!

* Is it that you want to be a great boss? – be a great person now!

 

Negative intentions will keep you limited, positive ones will move you forward.

 

HOW TO DO THAT?

** write a letter to yourself NOW from yourself THEN and read it every day!

** practice affirmations every single day by using I AM statement.

** believe in yourself truly!

** see in you the person you want to become!

** feel how it is going to be when you are that person you want to become.

** appreciate the wonderful person you are NOW!

 

RESULTS:

Manifest and create an image of where you want to be are your major vision.

You can see it, feel it, and be there! All your existence will work together with higher powers to get you there!

Your mind will focus on it by creating the opportunities.

Your soul will feel aligned and peaceful.

The Universe is sending any cues your way so you could become who you so deeply desire to be!

 

Be mindful of what you are asking for beYOUtiful😊

 

PROMPT: What resonated with you the most?

 
Check out that video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ihGkwARehAQ&t=377s

 

[The teachings in this blog come from my book “The True Identity” – publishing early 2019]

 

Advertisements

My daily rituals of self-care

I get asked more often what I do during my morning and evening routines. I get curious questions about what makes me feel grounded, rested, taken care of and recharged for my day to come. Many mysterious pictures of my ‘rituals’ on my social media platform bring more attention than ever.

What are the self-care practices of a busy and successful woman, and a life, love and spiritual coach?

Let me start by defining what actually self-care is. In my book “The True Identity” [publishing in Summer 2018] this is a big part of the process towards rediscovering your true potentials and authentic self. How come, some of you may ask?

Self-care is not limited to this what the modern world is assuming is enough and considered necessary. Massage, face mask, the visit to the spa or hot springs, haircut or manicure are some of the most practiced ones. How little of the actual self-care is that, though.

Self-care is the care of ‘self’, as the phrase says by itself.

The ‘self’ consists of the emotional, mental, spiritual and physical component.

Taking care of your physical body only is not enough for the well-being of the ‘self’. The new haircut won’t make you feel rested, recharged, beautiful inside and out and confident without the care of your self-talk, attitude, daily affirmations, thinking process, actions and connection to the higher ‘self’. There is much more into feeling nurtured and energized than a manicure. There is a way more beautiful way to feel worthy without an expensive weekend at the spa resort.

The total self-care must consist of the actions and practices towards nurturing all aspects of the person you are. Anybody of you can list right now plenty of things to do to take care of your physical body. However, what can you do to take care of your mental, emotional and spiritual ‘self’ today?

My rituals and routines

Every day, I start my day with washing my face with cold water, while giving myself a pep talk with plenty of positive affirmations and mantras. Then I prepare a tea and a water with apple cider. I drink them during my morning, as I don’t eat breakfast earlier than noon.  Sometimes I play some relaxing music during that process, sometimes I am in silence listening to birds outside.

Then I proceed to my sacred space, which is a little corner in my room, with my white meditation pillow, altar, and all magical tools. The space you want to create (altar, tools, pillow, candles, incense etc.) is purely personalized. You make your space and place the way you want. Don’t let anybody tell you what MUST be there and what not, it is your own calling, taste and creation of what you want to have in your sacred space. Make it cozy, comfortable and pretty. Use it as an expression of yourself.

I burn the candles and incense, I meditate (whatever style I feel like doing), and I do breathe work. There is no time limit for me unless I have other obligations to do afterward. But those don’t stop me from doing it at all or don’t make me rush as well. I set the intention each time to just be and to ground myself so I can go into a day and show up fully. That way the practice, no matter if it’s just 5 minutes or 30 minutes, is beautiful, relaxing, grounding and opening my mind and heart to whatever day brings.

After that I journal. I journal what my meditation brought up. I journal every day the gratitude, my blessings, and abundance.

I also draw the card from whatever card deck I am called to, either tarot or oracle cards. I love them and I have pretty big and beautiful collection of them. I play with them at any time I feel like. In the morning if I have a question, or I am concerned or wondering what to do that day. During the day when I want to have a little break between clients or activities, so they take my mind away from the worldly concerns and bring me back to the present, to the art they display or messages they show me. They are my personal tools to ground me and bring awareness to the beauty around.

 

During a day I make sure I have frequent breaks. I work with people, outside of the house and from the house so it could be very demanding to be on the go all the time and then not have a break. It may sound luxury and many of you will tell me that I am lucky having a possibility for a break. I created that myself, so you can do as well. I needed to because the hustle and constant work were bringing me closer to burn out rather than to being productive and loving what I do. I love my job and I want to show up fully energized and positive to it.

Breaks give me a little breather and benefit to recommit to myself and be more focused afterward. During my breaks, I can do some of the following: a little walk, water the plants in the garden, listen to motivational video or relaxing music, play with the tarot cards, get a snack, take a power nap, stretch, dance or text a friend.

Many times, I simply do nothing and I found that the best practice ever. I lay down on the floor and just stare at the ceiling. I don’t think and I am just breathing and being. I love this simple, free tool to reset! Try it yourself! It is extremely powerful!

 

In the evening my time is shorter, as I am more tired and I want to make sure I get 7 hours (or more) of sleep a night. I journal on how my day was, what and how I felt, on some realizations, some reflections and gratitude. I don’t start and finish a day without a gratitude. That is a big part of my routines.

Sometimes I have time to meditate, but if I don’t I simply reset by seating still and getting few deep breaths in and out. Many times, I do that in a bed too, finished by a simple “Thank you for today’s day”. That makes my day perfectly finished and beautiful, despite the circumstances.

In the evening there is time for me to read a book, though. Reading a book is a major part of my mental and personal development.

 

As you can see, all four aspects of the ‘self’ are being covered by my daily routines.

 

Anybody can do that, including YOURSELF! It is totally workable and doable. It may require some reorganization and arrangement around your day, shortening some activities or getting up 15 minutes earlier, but it is totally manageable.

 

If you would like to get some help with that, let me know. I help women with not only finding the sacred time for themselves but most importantly with finding who they truly are and what they actually want from life! Is it a boyfriend and husband, or a business, or maybe creating boundaries with their families? Whatever it is that you need to become the true and unlimited version of yourself, I can show you how!! Simply replay to this blog via comments or hit the email address below and connect with me.

izabelamch@gmail.com

 

You got this beYOUtiful! ❤

 

 

I am not enough! I am unworthy! I hate myself. IS THAT YOU?

I am happy for you today, though!

WHY? Hear me up!

As a beYOUtiful coach, I help women committed to finishing their struggle with any relationships in their lives; the romantic ones, the job-related ones, the family ones and the most important one, the relationship with themselves and their bodies.

I work with women who:

  • Don’t believe in themselves
  • Lost their worthiness
  • Feel that they are not enough
  • Are feeling tired of pleasing others
  • The worry of what others will say
  • Are afraid of judgment and rejection
  • Are feeling lost in their own lives
  • Have no clue who they are
  • Have no idea what they want to do
  • Can’t imagine how to move on
  • Are struggling with self-hate and self-love
  • Who has fear of not being loved
  • Have enough of the situation they are in
  • Who can’t imagine they may be successful.

Is this YOU?

When I started seeing that women who reached out to me were seeking the freedom, the lightness and alignment with themselves, feeling totally lost, miserable and stuck in their recent lives, I couldn’t help but interact with them.

I couldn’t help but hear their deep cries!

I wanted to find out what makes a woman, so many of us, feel unworthy, not enough, with no energy, drive, and motivation, despite the fact that every single of you could tell me today your dreams.

What makes you feel hateful towards yourself?

Why don’t you like your body, your actions, yourself?

Why don’t you see who you are?

Why don’t you believe you could write a book, run a company, have a loving partner and family, be happy as a single woman, or have plenty of non-toxic friends?

I hear you telling me:

  • ‘I hate myself, I can’t see myself in the mirror’
  • ‘I hate my body and how I look like’
  • ‘I can’t possibly do that’
  • ‘I am not enough’
  • ‘I never could do that so what does it make you feel I could now?’
  • ‘I am not smart enough’
  • ‘I don’t have resources to start up my business’
  • ‘I always date bad guys’
  • ‘I am not meant to have a family’
  • ‘My parents told me that I will never succeed’
  • ‘I am not confident at all and never will be’
  • ‘There is no way anybody can see me as attractive’
  • ‘I dieted all my life, I hate my body for what it does and how does it look like’
  • ‘I am so ashamed of myself’
  • ‘I can’t get naked in front of my partner’
  • ‘How can I love myself?’
  • ‘I never knew who I am actually’
  • ‘I need to always take care of others first and I have no time for myself’
  • ‘I don’t deserve that’
  • ‘I was always told to not be seen or speak up’.

 

I hear you!

I feel your pain!

I see your situation!

I imagine the struggle!

 

I am sad seeing the enormous beauty in every single of you, yet you hate herself.

I am sad seeing the strength in you, yet you feel totally weak.

I am sad seeing the opportunities for you, yet you don’t believe in yourself.

I am sad seeing the attractiveness in you, yet you feel unworthy of love.

I am heartbroken seeing you being stuck in the life you don’t even know how it happened.

I am sad because I know how that feels; being lost, self-hateful, heart-broken, abused and used, and not seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. It didn’t feel freeing at all. It didn’t feel empowering at all. It didn’t feel like there is anything in this life for me.

 

However, I am happy because I freaking know how much energy, power, strength, drive, and motivation you have.

I am happy because I know deep inside you are simply done with being where you are.

I am happy because I see the spark inside of you which just waits to be ignited.

I am happy because I know you are READY NOW!

I am happy because I know there is a way out for you!

There is the way out!!!!

 

This is your deepest SELF simply talking to you NOW.

This is the message from the Spirits, Divine, Universe and all Gods just for YOU!

 

beYOUtiful lady, you are ready!!!

Type “I am ready” and let’s rock this new life together!

 

You got this beYOUtiful! ❤

 

P.S. beYOUtiful is ‘cooking’ something behind the scene. Her scientific mindset creeps in and she is so eager to experiment, create some mysterious mixtures and magical nectars. The vibrations in her ‘lab’ are powerful. The outcomes seem to be more and more beautiful. The mission is to bring to the surface unbelievable colors of the matter which is called ‘The True Identity’.

What is going on in there?

What’s behind the scene?

The energy created by the high vibrations of preparing something so beautiful and gentle, powerful and free, is giving me the biggest joy, I have ever experienced.

 

The list of things-to-do and things- NOT-to-do

The phenomenon of lists of things-to-do is quite interesting.

As adults, we create lists, schedules, calendars, bucket lists and maybe even more so we feel in control of our lives. The notes, post-its, and notebooks piled up on our desk reminding us every single morning what we are here to do. The notifications on our phones or computers pop up constantly so we are not drawn to other activities. Once all of it shows up as soon as we wake up, the only thing we want to do is run away.

But wait a minute, do you want to run away from this precisely, well organized and super controlled system you have created for yourself? Doesn’t that sound ridiculous? Shouldn’t that be the system you truly want in your life?

 

It seems it’s not. It definitely feels heavy, overwhelming, and frustrating. As soon as we see all of those calendars on the desk and hear the millionth notification on our phone, we get anxious and stressed. The stress level rises up quickly, so by mid-day, we are a bundle of nervousness.

 

Does that sound like you? Does that resonate with you at all?

What does it take an adult to start creating the lists of things NOT-TO-DO? To be able to slow down, space out, take it easy and trust that things will be done anyway?

 

Have you ever considered creating such a list? Why not?

 

The idea came from the most intuitive human being on this planet, which is a child.

Ok, Izabela, what do you mean a child?

 

I mean that children are the most intuitive human beings on this planet. They dream big, they don’t plan and they don’t overstress. And somehow things get done for them in the most appropriate time, with great results. And I am not talking about the fact that you, adults, help them with things, restrict them from performing the way they want, limit their abilities and create the stories which are not theirs. If you would ever let the kid create, play, and do things they want, they would come up with such ideas, amazing stories and unlimited dreams, which they would truly believe they can accomplish.

 

If we would ever be able to come back to that mindset and start leading with our intuition, the life would be easier. If we would ever allow ourselves to play, enjoy and take a pride in every single accomplishment, the life would be so loving. If we would ever start dreaming big again, there would be so many magical things happening in this world.

 

In kid’s world, there are no limits or fears. There is curiosity, trial, and desire. There is questioning of everything so the next step can be taken with full awareness. There is that wonderment which allows them to walk towards their dreams until they are stopped by ‘you can’t do this’. Then they meet the ‘adult reality’, full of stress, control, limitations and misery with themselves.

 

Why can’t we simply smile, love and be curious as kids are?

Why can’t we simply create lists of things not-to-do EVER?

 

What would that list look like for you today?

 

You got this beYOUtiful! ❤

THE UNIVERSE IS A FUNKY PLACE

“Everything that happens in your life

is the best possible thing that can happen to you”

– Chris Prentiss

Every single moment we have a choice to make.

Every single moment of our life is given to us.

The question is, what will you do with it?

 

GRATITUDE

— If you invited friends to a dinner and they didn’t show their appreciation, would you invite them again? —

Say thank you. Be gracious.

First and foremost, appreciate Yourself. Be grateful for the life you live. Show thanks for the world around you, for your loved ones. Don’t take your money or housing for granted.  Especially, be grateful for your feelings and emotions. Be mindful of your inner voice and instincts.

Appreciate your loved ones. Find amazement and joy in the little things, such as a smile, a kind gesture, or a hug. Be aware of the beauty around you.

Appreciate your friends and co-workers. They are in your life for a reason. Be mindful of what your life could be without them.

Appreciate the stranger. Discover the magic behind the “thank you” expressed as you walk past someone in the grocery store. Be amazed by how much impact simple courtesy can have.

Appreciate the Universe. Would you be who you are without all the moments and experiences? By expressing appreciation for what you already have, you open the doors to receive more.

 

Say and give THANK YOU to your life: moments, events, people, items and whatever else you are grateful for. Avoid the temptation to compare yourself to others.

 

WHERE TO BEGIN?

** Write every morning and evening what you are grateful for – be honest!

** Ask yourself why you are grateful– be honest!

** Ask yourself what you could do to make someone else happy – act!

** Ask yourself how you could best contribute to create a better tomorrow – act!

** Say thank you to both the stranger and your friends.

 

RESULTS:

By appreciating yourself and others, you will feel lighter and happier. It will provide the encouragement needed for facing any obstacle you may have during the day.

As your day progresses, by expressing appreciation, you will experience more love, more smiles, and kindness.

 

LOVE

Self-love is different than self-care. Sure, you can get yourself a nice haircut, manicure or treat yourself to a fancy dinner. These are all external.

Self-love is internal.

Light a candle in a secluded place. Feel the silence. Feel your body. Feel your anxieties. Feel your happiness. Feel your inner voice.

Just be, and just listen. Is it making you feel uncomfortable? This is part of the process. Your inner voice is sending you an important message. Whatever it is, be in that feeling.

Marinate in the feelings. Say them out loud, write them down, and read them again. Cry, smile, or dance if you must.

All emotions have a purpose. They are not bad or good, they each have a purpose.

It is the actions that we chose to take that becomes bad or good. When we attempt to escape or hide, it simply extends our pain.

 

MINDFULNESS TIPS

** Mediate first thing in the morning. Resist the temptation to grab your phone.

** Give yourself time during the day to breath, to “space out”, to day dream.

** Journal your emotions. Try your best to be a “neutral observer” and refrain from being critical and judgmental.

** Stay alert to all the good things around you.

 

RESULTS:

The more you take care of yourself, the more love you are able to spread.

The more you love yourself, the more compassion you will find.

The more you respect yourself, the more kindness will be in your presence.

 

INTENTION

What you choose to focus on…is it serving or hindering you?

Do you visualize your future as if it’s happening now?

Do you see yourself as a successful, happy, balanced and empowered woman?

The way you see yourself walking, feeling, reacting, living is what you will become.

Do you want to be anxiety-free? – imagine that lightness!

Do you want to be loved? – know that you are loved!

Do you want respect? – act that way!

Do you want to be debt-free? – picture that financial freedom!

Negative intentions will delay progress, positive ones will move you forward.

 

ACTION

** Practice affirmations every day by using the words “I am…”

** Believe and trust in yourself

** Honor and nourish potential

** Feel what it will be like to be your genuine, best self

** Appreciate the wonderful person you are now

 

RESULTS:

Manifest and create a vision of where you want to be. You will see it, feel it, and be there! Your soul will feel aligned and peaceful. The universe will send many cues your way. You will become who you so deeply desire to be!

Stay mindful of yourself what you are asking for. 😊

 

I am HERE. I am NOW. I am ME. ❤

 

@ Photo by Kurt Tysver and http://www.highaltitudephotos.com/

 

DO LOVE & DO MAGIC ❤

 

Since I became aware of my life being a precious gift, I started searching for the answer to that ONE question: WHY AM I REALLY HERE?

I went through my whole life as totally blinded zombie-human, not knowing what is happening around me, not recognizing kindness in others eyes, not seeing beauty in the life I had and numbing the magical nature sounds with the highest volume of my electro music! It could have been like that until now, if some breakthroughs and awakenings weren’t to happen!

In this life I fought to survive. Serious migraines which left me almost unconscious in 6th grade, being rescued from committing suicide, surviving heart attack and cancer, overcoming depression and multiple approaches to commit suicide again and again, over and over.

 

BUT I DID SURVIVE!

I DO LIVE NOW!

BUT WHY???

 

I wanted to know.

I craved to know the deep meaning.

Was it to live, experience, discover and find happiness that we all crave?

or

Was it for something FAR greater than that?

So, I started to dig deep.

 

* Was is it that there was a part of me that was here to leave a legacy?

* Was it that I came here to make a difference, to shine my light?

* Was it that I came here to share my gift and do magic?

* Was it that I came here to live a life full of purpose and love?

* Was it that everything I went through this time would lead me to this exact point in my life where I would discover what I have been actually seeking?

* Was it that I would find a true meaning this time?

 

Now those questions, I FEEL in my bones, in my nerves, in every single cell and receptor.

 

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

I feel that there IS SOMETHING FAR GREATER for you to discover here, than you can even imagine.

 

I urge you to discover the wisdom, knowledge and the knowing deep inside of you.

Because what I know to be true is that WE ARE ALL just trying to find our own POTENTIAL of who we came here to BE.

And what I am sure about that we are all here to do magic and share love!

 

I am HERE. I am NOW. I am ME. ❤

Nut Butter Breakthrough

Do you live in the reality where you were told that some things in this world are just bad? Do you interact with people who constantly bombard you with judgment and opinions? Do you create your own world around those notions, thoughts, stories and beliefs that you gathered during your life, and that are not necessarily true?

Where am I headed to with those questions? What does that have to do with nut butter?

 

Oh, let me tell you my story.

I have never shared this before.

The entire world believes that being a bodybuilder, looking wonderfully lean and muscular, fit and athletic, is the healthiest thing someone could get involved in. There is no bigger misinterpretation than that. The myth of “healthy” bodybuilding can be easily debunked. I did look awesome, the best ever in my life, that’s true. Have I worked hard? Oh, heck yes, the hardest “job” I have ever done was getting ready for that stage. The limitations, deprivations, rules and what’s good and what’s totally not good or allowed, losing the social life, having no time for anything but gym, are the major “bonuses” to it. Moreover, I consider these even better: insomnia during the night, sleepiness during the day, lack of period, total lack of energy, adrenal fatigue, hypothyroidism and extreme food intolerance.

What I found the most incredible during that time is the way to look at the food and the body. Being at 7% body fat on the stage is an indication of your well-done work, and then gaining 2 pounds is considered not good anymore.

But where did I lose the main character of this story, nut butter? The cheat meal or carbing up by eating pizza, donuts and the crappiest food on this planet, was considered “good” and “beneficial” for your gains. However, eating healthy, full of good nutrients and good fats, nut butter, was the worst thing you could even think of, totally sabotaging your progress. Having this type of “cheat meal” was making me fat, over night actually, and thanks to it I most likely wouldn’t be able to step on the stage.

Do you follow me? Do you see the story behind it? Do you see the misleading beliefs here?

 

Where am I headed with that now?

Here it is. The bodybuilding world doesn’t talk about, but 85% girls start with it because they either have already underlying eating disorders and body image issues, or they end up with that after pursuing that journey. And I was on both sides. Yes, I am a girl who suffered bulimia and anorexia as a teenager, in mid and late 20s, and of course the “exciting” disorder became more dangerous after competitions. Every single pound is an obsession, every single bite of food is making me fat overnight. Every single spoon of that freaking nut butter is sabotaging all my athletic performance. But wait, what if I eat pizza, or donuts – then I should be fine, right?!

 

Do you see where I am getting to?

The messed-up stories and beliefs someone told me during that time, create the person I am now. And if you are me, you hate your body, you binge, then purge and hate yourself even more. And the vicious cycle is never going to end unless you stop yourself, you literally get yourself into the silent place, remove the worldly distractions and ask yourself the major question: what problem, emotions, pain, feelings, or issue am I trying to numb with food or any other addiction?

The root of that addiction was somewhere deep inside of me. Exactly like the root of my love-hate feelings toward a simple food like nut butter. Why was I loving it and hating it just after I ate it? Why was I craving it, even though I wasn’t hungry, so I could purge afterwards? Why was I even buying it, if it was making me so overly fat?? WHY?

Because the root of that was simple: someone told me that this type of food is making me fat. That nut butter will make me weak. That this food will make me perform bad. That thanks to this food I better stop pursuing whatever athletic and sport goals I had. Because I am going to fail…if I keep eating it. I am not exaggerating this story. It is my real, deep and true story.

 

So, if you still reading, listen: dig deep inside of your soul and heart, allow yourself to feel it, to think, to be in the moments with yourself, your memories – even if they are painful. Pain is the best teacher we could ever have in this world.

Use it wisely!

 

You got this beYOUtiful! ❤

 

 

Step by Step… [The Emotional and Mental Memoir from Ultra Beast Spartan Race]

This is not a recap of an Ultra Beast Race. You can read those elsewhere. This is a mental and emotional piece about somebody’s inner world.

This is not a blog with ideas and tips on how to train. It is not about how to eat and prepare for one of the toughest obstacle endurance races. This is an expression of a soul screaming after facing an unknown field of defeat and disqualification.

The “Ultra Beast Spartan Race” is one of the longest obstacle races in the OCR series. What does that mean for an overachieving athlete like me? It means there is going to be a mental challenge. It inevitably leads to the question of “to be or not be” in the game.

 

Weeks before….

In the weeks leading up to that moment, I often found myself overthinking and over-analyzing the upcoming race. Of course, this would be interspersed with moments of calmness, and times of not thinking about the race at all. As a professional athlete, business owner, and life coach, I have learned firsthand how overthinking will never result in anything good. It only leads to fear, stress and demotivation. Overanalyzing is even worse; it creates an overpowering fear of losing control. I am the last one to predict the weather, the course, the obstacles, and most importantly: to predict my own body’s reaction and feelings.

I find it very relaxing to not think about the race at all. Yes, “spacing out” can irritate the ones who love you most. But guess what? I love spacing out. I bask in the moments when I allow the universe to think on my behalf. I love not knowing what the future may hold. I love to be at peace, doing what I do every day: eat healthy, train hard, stretch, rest, and sleep.

 

The night before….

That day before the Ultra Beast was one of the most serene days of my life. All my work was done. I was up to date on updating my clients’ plans. Everything was taken care of. The trip was planned, I had checked the weather. Even the last-minute gels had been purchased and packed. I was ready.

I decided to go on a walk. I was fully present. I looked up at the sky to see the stars, ever grateful for that precious moment! Silence is the best medicine for me before such a race.

Every professional athlete takes time to just sit with their own thoughts.

I shut down all the voices and all the stress.  This is the best anyone can do the night before a big race!

 

On race day….

Morning brought silence. With a carbed-up breakfast and mental focus, I knew what I wanted most in that moment. I thought: There is nothing else but me.

Me, the way I am now. Completely present, two hours before the start. Me, the most athletic, the best prepared, the healthiest person. I can face the unknown. All will be good, because I will take it step by step.

I did everything within my power, right? I am the strongest I could possibly be, right? I prepared every single detail for this race, right? Yes, I did.

Let’s do this!

 

The Race….

Start, slow start…

I relinquished my inner-will to chase the rest of the competitors. I kept repeating: “Pace yourself”. It soon became my mantra for the race.

“When the breathing peaks up, all I do is pace myself.”

Suddenly, I recalled everything I ever read or heard about the importance of breathing. How successful of a tool it is for stress management. Was I stressed? Not particularly, but I was very focused. I wasn’t going to let any breathing struggles get in my way. “You got this” and “keep going” was mentioned frequently by those passing me.

Yes, my legs keep moving step by step. “There is no other way but forward” my mind exclaims. “You got this, beYOUtiful!” I said to myself, as I approached a steep hill.

Step by step. I removed any thoughts about the obstacles that were ahead of me.

“That is the next step, let me focus on the uphill right now.”

I relinquished all care about the future. I knew that all I had to focus on was my next step. I had brief bursts of energy, helping me refocus, recharge.

Suddenly, I was battling an obstacle. My mind went blank. I swiftly reminded myself that I was moving forward. In my mind, “burpee” became synonymous with “obstacle”. I thought: “I will not allow ‘burpees’ to disturb my stubborn Taurus personality.”

Do you remember saying from the movie, “Dori”?

“Just keep swimming.”

Exactly. Keep moving. Keep swimming. Keep running!

 

Suddenly, my body was telling me something….

Was it a pinch in the knee? I tried to decipher the feeling. “Listen knee, we have a second lap to do. We’ve got this. Just cooperate with me and stop fighting, ok?”

As the miles added up, I felt my body in places I wasn’t expecting. I tried to reassure myself. I had never had issues with my ankles and knees before.

“Let me change the way I run. Let’s try to slow down and let refocus on the course. I know my body, all will be fine.”

As I made it through another obstacle, I thought, “That was easy, which means I’m a badass! Even the cold doesn’t bother me as much as others that I am slowly passing. Wow, I prepared really well.”

I had just finished facing the biggest fear of my life. Swimming didn’t kill me physically, but it broke me mentally.

As I plunged in to the icy water, I tried to my best to have a positive mindset. But, unfortunately, the panic attack was stronger.

“That’s ok, it’s in the past. Let’s do burpees and move on. I’ve got a second lap to do and I need to have a serious conversation with my body parts.”

 

Downhill…

I know the difference between pain and discomfort. I have an incredibly high pain tolerance. But this pain was excruciating.

“Knee, please, please don’t do this to me now. Why are you actually hurting? I’ve been so kind to you. I’ve been pacing myself this entire time.”

My pace began to slow.

Still, I moved on, step by step. But I felt it. No, it wasn’t pain. It was fear, creeping in to my thoughts. I had worked so hard on letting my fear go, just days before the race.

“Go away!!!!”

As I pictured my ligaments tearing and visualized tripping and rolling down this hill, my inner self shouted “NO, NO, NO!!!”

But I’m stubborn. The overachiever, the badass, the winner.

 

I had to decide….

The pain became unbearable. Do you know those pain scales in the hospital, with “1” being the best and “10” being the worst? I was at a 9, maybe 10, and it brought tears to my eyes. It was so intense that I could barely hold my focus as I limped. A fight between my inner-worlds ensued.

“Didn’t you accomplish 12 hours of the brutal Hurricane Heat event? Do you remember what you were telling yourself there? Yes, so keep repeating: step, step, step, step. Don’t think about giving up. Just: step, step, step, step. Shut up and move on. Step, step, step. This is your dream. Step, step, step. This is your life. Step, step, step.”

I couldn’t take another.

“Please don’t do that to me! Don’t fade, please. I can go, I can move….”

Having to give away your inner power hurts more than any knee ever could. I had to decide to let my partner continue through the race without me. I felt like I let myself down, and I had never envisioned this would happen!

 

Afterwards….   

I felt empty, I felt lost, I felt disempowered. I had lost myself somewhere on the 15-mile mark.

Someone else must have decided to DNF on my behalf. It was not the Izabela I know. She never gives up. She never whines. She never uses pain as an excuse! The Izabela I know lives by the saying: “be comfortable with uncomfortable”. It was someone other than me that decided to quit. I know I could’ve gone on and finished it!

But no, continuing with that pain wouldn’t have been possible.

The Izabela I know is also caring of herself and others. She is supportive. She inspires and motivates herself and other. She might be unstoppable, but she also knows when it’s time to practice self-care. She may have the strength to break ice, but she also knows how to melt ice with self-love. She knows that dreams do come true. They just come true during the right time, at the right place.

 

Everything happens for a reason.

 

You got this beYOUtiful! ❤

….. step by step ……

Giving thanks

THANK YOU

… for being the love when I needed to feel loved

THANK YOU

… for being the ears when I needed to be heard

THANK YOU

… for being the pure page when I needed to write my life chapter

THANK YOU

… for being the courage when I needed the compassion

THANK YOU

… for being the passion when I needed to see my life purpose

THANK YOU

… for being the silence when I needed to feel your presence

THANK YOU

…for being

 

THANK YOU is a magical expression.

It breaks the coldest hearts, it opens up the most closed minds, it melts the most stubborn souls and it brings the joy to the most resentful egos.

It is meant to show an appreciation, a gratitude, love, an accomplishment, pride and happiness.

It means a world to the most tired mother and approval to the hardest working employee.

It connects the furthest relationships.

It expresses the hidden feelings.

It is meant to be used often… because world deserves to be appreciated for all beauty and magic it provides.

 

THANK YOU FOR BEING beYOUtiful! ❤