Let’s talk about personal responsibility.

The definition of ‘responsibility’ by Merriam-Webster Dictionary is the quality or state of being responsible and having moral, legal, or mental accountability.

When it comes to the responsibility of others and other things in our lives, we actually know the best how to do that.

However, when it comes to personal responsibility, there is an uncomfortable silence in the crowd. It’s either because people may not know what is that exactly, or – what I found very interesting – they don’t want to take that type of responsibility on.

And this is where the personal responsibility asks for the attention!

So, let’s start from the beginning. What is that personal responsibility, how can you be fully responsible for yourself and how is this going to impact your life?

What is the personal responsibility?

As the name states already, it the responsibility you take for yourself, your attitude, actions, reactions, words and anything you do towards others and yourself.

It is also the responsibility for your emotionality, life experiences, choices, energies, communications, language, boundaries, and self-work.

Sounds like a lot of responsibilities. Right?

And that makes you a loving, kind, compassionate and caring human being.

How can you be fully responsible for yourself and your life?

Being responsible fully for yourself is a daily practice of self-awareness and self-compassion. It requires you to be mindful of your actions, behaviors or emotions in a way that you take full responsibility for anything you commit to do or follow, and anything that comes out of it.

As my mentor, Elizabeth DiAlto, says, “check yourself before you wreck yourself”.

Pay attention to what’s coming up for you personally as you interact with others. Stop, breath in and revisit it before you destroy the party and everyone’s moods including your own.

Don’t project your emotions and energies onto others before you check-in with yourself first. It’s always best to ask rather than assume or read into what people are saying or doing.

If something triggers you, take a moment (or many moments) to be with your own emotions before responding. Being charged usually doesn’t serve good communication.

Be committed to your choices. Be fully aware that those were your own choices and nobody forced them onto you.

As I always say, “it is nobody’s business to make you happy’. Be aware of what makes you happy and what doesn’t and take responsible actions to feel what you want to feel.

Don’t blame the external world for the chaos and storms in your internal world. Rather give yourself space and time to see what are your emotions trying to tell you and how could you work on it with self. Most of the chaos in the outside world we create by not managing our internal chaos.

Create healthy boundaries where you can grow, blossom, nurture yourself and be true and authentic, so that others can benefit from it as well. Boundaries are important for healthy relationships with others and yourself.

How is this going to impact your life?

Oh, big times!!!!

First, the feeling of self-awareness of your needs wants and triggers creates an amazing tool for self-work.

Second, seeing that you are the creator of your life, day by day, gives you back the power you have within.

Third, knowing that your choices, actions, and behaviors impact you the same as others allow you to take care of them with love and compassion.

Fourth, you become the person you truly wanted to be: aware, calm, responsible, compassionate, loving, caring, aligned, light and happy!

PROMPT: How do you take a personal responsibility in your life now?

[The teachings in this blog come from my book “The True Identity” – publishing early 2019]

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The path to redefining and rediscovering the love in my life

“If you don’t believe in love, what’s the point in living?” -Ron Swanson

 

I remember the beginning of the journey to so-called ‘self-love’. The task was to tell myself twelve times the affirmation “I love myself”. To made this more profound and actually working, I was supposed to be looking at myself in the mirror, straight into my own eyes. All was supposed to happen after I woke up, so no other thoughts were in my mind yet.

The task was easy in its description, yet it was the hardest one I have ever endured. Or at least tried.

You may ask me, ‘did it work”?

‘Is this why you are now so self-loving?’

 

Unfortunately, not.

That task was extremely hard to perform and follow through. The entire process felt heavy on my heart. I became more resentful, and actually more resistant every day. The more I was repeating these words, the more disbelieving I felt.

  • I started doubting the actual task and its effects.
  • I was wondering how other women managed to go through it and get to that beautiful place of self-love.
  • I doubted the affirmations itself, too.

 

Today, I believe that affirmations work, but only when they are aligned with your core desired values.

I believe that before we start repeating the affirmations, we need to evaluate our core desired values first. It is crucial to see and feel what you are actually craving the most… and what it is that needs your attention the most.

 

I started asking myself the questions, which I invite you to ask yourself today, too:

  • What did you love doing as a kid?
  • What do you crave in the life?
  • What comes so naturally to you and it flows with an ease?
  • What matters to you the most?
  • What sparks your heart and brings a smile on your face?
  • What do you stand for?
  • What you can’t tolerate at all?
  • What are you VERY CLEAR that you DO NOT want in your life?

 

The clear list of things I truly desired and things I knew deep inside of my heart that I never wanted to deal with was a start point to start talking to myself in a more kind, positive and loving way.

That core desired feelings allowed me to see what I wanted to commit to in my life.

The clear and pure desires were the foundation to set up the self-love on.

 

I knew what I wanted in my life.

I didn’t know HOW to get that, yet. But ‘how’ wasn’t important then. The most important thing was to rewire my mind onto the path of affirming beautiful words and beliefs to myself.

 

So, I started by telling myself:

‘I may not love myself yet, but I am on the path to living the life where accepting and liking my body will be natural and easy.’

‘I may not know how to nurture myself yet, but I am totally on the path to start with small self-care practices and see how they make me feel.’

 

I kept telling myself that phrase that ‘I am in the process…’ every day the entire day and everything was getting easier. I knew what I desired and now I was collaborating with my own mind.

My mind was very happy by these conversations, and all affirmations felt compatible with what I truly wanted in my life. I spontaneously was choosing better actions and steps throughout the day and that felt so amazing.

Constant dialog with myself that I was in the process of becoming the highest version of myself lightened me up and motivated to keep doing what I was doing.

More and more beautiful things started falling into place. There were bumps, but it became easier to walk through them. There were pains and tears, but acceptance was something that I was choosing then.

 

Today I know, that I would never ever change the trajectory of my own journey towards self-love. I know that the best gift I could ever give myself is true, deep and sparkly self-love I have to myself now.

 

I know that there is not a better gift than the guidance to self-love that I could give to anybody I care about.

 

*** How did your journey to self-love look like?

*** How does this journey look like right now?

 

 

You got this beYOUtiful! ❤

 

What does self-discovery mean to you?

[this entire text is an excerpt from my book “The True Identity” which is going to be released this Summer, 2018 – stay tuned here]

I would like to tell you that you are on the journey to the world of yourself every single day. It is a beautiful journey of self-discovery. The journey when you get to see what your true potential, power, strength, and identity is.

 

What does the self-discovery actually mean to you?

Have you thought of it for a minute?

 

Self-discovery to me is the realization of who I am and why I am.

It is the deep feeling of my own value, beauty, and worthiness without questioning it.

It is the moment when external approvals and validations are not needed anymore because all that I need I can give it to myself.

Self-discovery for me is reconnecting with deep roots of my being, with my Inner Child and all that she needs and feels.

It is the magical moment of being present, recognizing my body’s and soul’s desires and acting on them.

It is being in alignment, peace and flow with the nature of my true identity.

 

It sounds deep and very poetical. You may ask, do you truly believe that, Izabela? Is this just a metaphor or a real feeling? Who actually can achieve that state of mind, body, and soul?

 

My answer is clear, yes, I do believe in what I wrote. Moreover, I do believe even more that you truly can accomplish this state, too.

We choose every day what we want to do, how we want to act, and who we want to feel like. You can choose differently every day.

You can choose to feel peaceful, worthy and beautiful. You also can choose to feel tired, unworthy, and not enough.

You can totally go out to the world choosing to be confident and expensive or hide away from your true voice.

You can choose to be playful, joyful and happy that day, or miserable, disappointed and angry.

You can have fun with even the most unbearable task, choosing to act upon your intuition and self-trust, being in flow with your core values, what you want to create and how you want to feel. Or you can choose to drag it over days and weeks, make yourself sick and reject everyone around you, or block any ways to solve the problems by seeing the only negative outcome.

 

I could list the life scenarios like that over and over.

 

We all got the same life, the same time and the same free will and right to choose. It is a powerful tool which you are holding in your hands right now and every moment!

 

It is your choice every single day.

It is your choice to choose differently.

It is your choice to keep discovering yourself every day!

 

Your Mantras:

I can choose differently every day.

I choose happiness, joy, and playfulness.

I choose worthiness.

I chose to be confident and beautiful today.

I choose ____________.

 

[this entire text is an excerpt from my book “The True Identity” which is going to be released this Summer, 2018 – stay tuned here]

 

 

You got this beYOUtiful! ❤

THE UNIVERSE IS A FUNKY PLACE

“Everything that happens in your life

is the best possible thing that can happen to you”

– Chris Prentiss

Every single moment we have a choice to make.

Every single moment of our life is given to us.

The question is, what will you do with it?

 

GRATITUDE

— If you invited friends to a dinner and they didn’t show their appreciation, would you invite them again? —

Say thank you. Be gracious.

First and foremost, appreciate Yourself. Be grateful for the life you live. Show thanks for the world around you, for your loved ones. Don’t take your money or housing for granted.  Especially, be grateful for your feelings and emotions. Be mindful of your inner voice and instincts.

Appreciate your loved ones. Find amazement and joy in the little things, such as a smile, a kind gesture, or a hug. Be aware of the beauty around you.

Appreciate your friends and co-workers. They are in your life for a reason. Be mindful of what your life could be without them.

Appreciate the stranger. Discover the magic behind the “thank you” expressed as you walk past someone in the grocery store. Be amazed by how much impact simple courtesy can have.

Appreciate the Universe. Would you be who you are without all the moments and experiences? By expressing appreciation for what you already have, you open the doors to receive more.

 

Say and give THANK YOU to your life: moments, events, people, items and whatever else you are grateful for. Avoid the temptation to compare yourself to others.

 

WHERE TO BEGIN?

** Write every morning and evening what you are grateful for – be honest!

** Ask yourself why you are grateful– be honest!

** Ask yourself what you could do to make someone else happy – act!

** Ask yourself how you could best contribute to create a better tomorrow – act!

** Say thank you to both the stranger and your friends.

 

RESULTS:

By appreciating yourself and others, you will feel lighter and happier. It will provide the encouragement needed for facing any obstacle you may have during the day.

As your day progresses, by expressing appreciation, you will experience more love, more smiles, and kindness.

 

LOVE

Self-love is different than self-care. Sure, you can get yourself a nice haircut, manicure or treat yourself to a fancy dinner. These are all external.

Self-love is internal.

Light a candle in a secluded place. Feel the silence. Feel your body. Feel your anxieties. Feel your happiness. Feel your inner voice.

Just be, and just listen. Is it making you feel uncomfortable? This is part of the process. Your inner voice is sending you an important message. Whatever it is, be in that feeling.

Marinate in the feelings. Say them out loud, write them down, and read them again. Cry, smile, or dance if you must.

All emotions have a purpose. They are not bad or good, they each have a purpose.

It is the actions that we chose to take that becomes bad or good. When we attempt to escape or hide, it simply extends our pain.

 

MINDFULNESS TIPS

** Mediate first thing in the morning. Resist the temptation to grab your phone.

** Give yourself time during the day to breath, to “space out”, to day dream.

** Journal your emotions. Try your best to be a “neutral observer” and refrain from being critical and judgmental.

** Stay alert to all the good things around you.

 

RESULTS:

The more you take care of yourself, the more love you are able to spread.

The more you love yourself, the more compassion you will find.

The more you respect yourself, the more kindness will be in your presence.

 

INTENTION

What you choose to focus on…is it serving or hindering you?

Do you visualize your future as if it’s happening now?

Do you see yourself as a successful, happy, balanced and empowered woman?

The way you see yourself walking, feeling, reacting, living is what you will become.

Do you want to be anxiety-free? – imagine that lightness!

Do you want to be loved? – know that you are loved!

Do you want respect? – act that way!

Do you want to be debt-free? – picture that financial freedom!

Negative intentions will delay progress, positive ones will move you forward.

 

ACTION

** Practice affirmations every day by using the words “I am…”

** Believe and trust in yourself

** Honor and nourish potential

** Feel what it will be like to be your genuine, best self

** Appreciate the wonderful person you are now

 

RESULTS:

Manifest and create a vision of where you want to be. You will see it, feel it, and be there! Your soul will feel aligned and peaceful. The universe will send many cues your way. You will become who you so deeply desire to be!

Stay mindful of yourself what you are asking for. 😊

 

I am HERE. I am NOW. I am ME. ❤

 

@ Photo by Kurt Tysver and http://www.highaltitudephotos.com/

 

12 Weeks Important to Create a Habit of Lifestyle Changes, Healthy Choices and Balanced Emotions

Challenge Up 12-week program: http://beyoutiful.fit/challengeup/. Make sure to sign up before January 4th, 2018. The kick off of the program is on that day!

Wait, 12 weeks is too long? Why not 21 days as everyone believed it should take?

Some people say that it takes 21 days to form a new habit. But according to a research done by Phillipa Lally, a psychology researcher, reveals that it actually takes about 66 days to form a new habit.

The researchers examined the habits of 96 people for a 12-week period. Every person was asked to select one habit to adopt for that period.

They reported each day if they were able to do what they choose and how they felt about it. The habits were things like drinking 2 liters of water every day to running 15 minutes before dinner. After the 12-weeks period elapsed the conclusion was that it takes a minimum of two months to build a new habit.

Why 12 weeks?

12 weeks is adequate to create good habits such as exercising or cutting out junk foods from the diet. Our fitness program gears towards a comprehensive plan that involves customized nutrition plans, personalized coaching and support from a private community.

Our 12-week program will be systematic and help you to make healthy changes one step at a time. Going through this program will boost your self-esteem and make you feel good about yourself and your body once more. You not only get a fit and sexy body but also your emotions are transformed to the better.

Not so perfect but…

The best part is you will still be able to build the habit that you want. It doesn’t matter if you mess up one or two times, you can still pick yourself up and start again. There is no reason to judge yourself that you couldn’t manage to transform yourself in 21 days.

Remember that you don’t have to be perfect. Being human means making mistakes and learning from them. Give yourself a chance to make mistakes and treat failure as a learning experience and develop strategies to get back on track immediately.

 

Embracing your long journey to good health

Remember that you don’t need to rush the process. You need enough time to train and be fit and 12 weeks is perfect. Remember that achieving the body of your dreams is not an event, it is a lifelong process. It took time for you to add weight, and it may take more time to shed the extra weight.

You have developed the unhealthy behaviors over a long period. Therefore, it may take time to replace unhealthy habits with healthy ones. Many people find it difficult when they try to change too much unhealthy behaviors too fast. To ensure that you succeed in your quest, focus on one goal or change at a time. After you have a well-established healthy routine, you can try work on another goal that works toward the overall change you’re striving for.

Nevertheless, you have to embrace the process and commit to it. Understanding this will make it easier for you to manage your expectations. You will commit to small workout plans rather than a high-intensity workout that will cause burnouts and cause you to give up because you expect huge changes that will not take place if you don’t do it right. And the right way is to be patient. Don’t pressure yourself to rush this.

At the end of the day, you have goals that you want to achieve. And it doesn’t matter how long you take, but that you will actually get the results that you want. Habits take a longer time to form and all you need is 12 weeks of personalized coaching and nutrition guidance alongside a support community for support and accountability.

What more will you need? Really.

Sign up for the program and change your life for the better.

 

You got this beYOUtiful! ❤